I’ve spent my entire life thinking that if things were going well, something bad was due to happen to ruin everything. And unfortunately I was always right. I now know that I had summoned those bad things with my negative thoughts.

I had a beautiful 5 year old son, and was anxious to give him a sibling. I got pregnant as soon as we started trying. I was full of doubt about this pregnancy, thinking I couldn’t possibly be blessed with another easy pregnancy and healthy baby like the first time around. I worried about everything that could go wrong.

I went for my first set of blood tests and told the nurse I just worried that something would go wrong with this one. She said not to think that way, that I had already produced one healthy child and most likely would have another. I wish I had listened to her. I just knew that test would come back with a bad result. It did, and I was sent for an ultrasound. I knew the technician would see something bad and she did. My son had a Cystic Hygroma, a lump on the back of his neck where fluid collected. That lump could do one of two things; disappear or get larger. I spent nearly every waking moment on the internet researching these Hygromas and reading the grim stories and worst-case scenarios. It further fueled my negative thoughts of losing my son.

The worst did eventually happen. At six months of gestation my son had passed away and I had to deliver him stillborn. I mourned him terribly, but I knew in my heart that as soon as my body was able, I would try again to give my first born a sibling to love and grow with.

I had 4 early miscarriages after that and almost gave up hope. I was waiting for some blood test results on my thyroid and other things that can cause miscarriages, but I was ovulating and hated to pass it up. I didn’t even know The Secret then, but I felt like the time was right to try again, and I had asked my mother what she thought. She said she had a good feeling that this would be the one. My husband said exactly the same thing when I asked him. I think their positive energy helped boost my own, and so we went for it.

I felt good about things for the first time in a long time. I believed this was going to be the healthy daughter I always envisioned myself having. The entire pregnancy went well until my last ultrasound. They said they noticed something on her kidney. They would do a test after she was born to see if there was a defect. I told myself that it was nothing, and I knew in my heart she would be just fine. Well, I was right. She was the picture of health and her kidney was fine. I believed she would be fine and she was. She is exactly as I had envisioned her, too!

When I listened to The Secret it was like a light bulb went on in my head. I just knew it was my thoughts that created these events in my life.

The Secret has changed my whole outlook on life. I no longer wait for the other shoe to drop. I just have faith that everything will be wonderful, and that only good things will come. I’m so grateful for this new life of mine. It just keeps getting better!